y am i so emo these days?

dulu gadoh dgn kawan baek.
skarang pisah dengan kawan baek.
lepas ni apelagi?

the adults say : "if you think arguing with your friends would be the worst, think again. that's just the beginning"

goshh. betul la. orang cakap masa remaja la kita nak cari identiti diri, kawan, and love of course. (err cerita lain.) about finding my own identity, umm i frankly don't know what's it.
am i like this? or like that? or not? or yes?
kawan . hmm. mereka meninggal kan saya .
my very the bestest (AH LANTAK AH GRAMMAR SALAH KE APA) friend Fatin sudah pindah sekolah tapi hakikatnya dia tak nak. she wants to stay but opportunities like this [ note: getting an offer to go to a cluster school ] is not what you always get. it's such a waste if she rejects , no?
i even told her to go there because of that. i know. she deserves the best.
i read zzah's (another bff that moved to the same school but earlier) comment on someone's fs
that says fatin looks sad there . even zzah can sense that.
i don't know what to do.
Shidah telah diajak berkapel oleh Fiqz (the bestfriend that i fought with , until now there's no sign to reconcile at all) . and for your info, i've liked this guy when we were bestfriends. but i never did tell him cuz i don't want to ruin our friendship.
and now i dont know if i still like him or not right now.
but when i knew he proposed Shidah (err,sangat skema tauu KAH KAH KAH), i didn't feel jealous or whatsoever.
i was like : " uh yea? ooo "
[ note again : Shidah is my bff too ]

it's obvious that he tries to stay away from me. except when Shidah is just beside me then he's left with no choice.
since i'm the class monitor assistant (eh betol ke?) , i've got things to handle with the class .
you know, when the class teacher asks you to record this, write that, do this, do that. it requires everbody's data . and dulu2 kalau nak jalan sebelah budak perempuan budak tuh takda brani .
but just yesterday he and Shidah walked along (dengan bestfren laki tuh skali)to the science lab.
i didn't walk along Shidah, i walked with the other boys in front.

malas arr. i have hw to do but still i keep onlining, hadeyh cane nak siap nehh?? -__-'
and the hw are :